My Photo
Location: Clearwater, South Carolina, United States

Thursday, August 11, 2005

gnus, gnats and gnomes

Which is smarter -- a gnat or a gnu? (A gnu being a large African antelope) The vote would seem to come down heavily on the gnu side because the gnat seems to know only enough to fly into eyes, ears, noses and mouths, but then they don't get eaten by lions, except mostly by accident and that notably with the negligent gnat in the gnu's nostril while it was being gnawed.

Since there are so many gnats -- could it be that we only see, hear, smell and taste the thrill seekers or the suicidal? Are the elite, learned gnats watching all this from the sidelines and shaking their heads at their fellow-gnats foolhardiness?

Then gnus -- they supposedly possess some intelligence, but they hardly notice when faced with the news of a new gnu -- but when the most important thing in your life is to know how to eat grass and run fast -- it would tend to leave some slackness between the ears. But if a lion catches a gnu napping, it's naught to the lion whether it's an old gnu or a new gnu -- it just becomes nourishment.

Then there's gnomes - unless I've mixed my fairy tales like I do metaphors, I seem to remember that they always have a knife, are old and bent looking, wear short pants, travel a lot, are strongly opinionated and have trouble discussing anything other than their own beliefs -- you are either on their side or are the enemy -- and this naturally negates neutrality.

The gnome then that's hardest to negotiate with is the knavish, knuckle-headed, nomadic, gnarly gnome with known gnostic notions, in knickers with a new knife. He's likely to knock a knot on your noggin with a nodule of gneiss. Sounds like some people I know, though nobody I would want to name, bless their hearts.


Post a Comment

<< Home