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Monday, January 23, 2006

shopping - 1

Let me say right at the beginning of this soliloquy that I do not like to ‘shop’ – it is a four-letter word and like all the other bad four-letter words, it is something that should not be talked about, mentioned, or even suggested. But in the case of this word ‘shop’ I must put my thoughts, feelings, and yes, even fears, down in some sort of missive in an effort to purge them from my system.

If one defines the word ‘shop’, the meaning that emerges is: (1)- (a) to examine goods or services with intent to buy (b) to probe the market in search of the best buy. These seem rather innocent, but there is another, more ominous meaning: (2)- to make a search.

But even this last meaning is incomplete unless combined with the word ‘meander’ – definition: To wander aimlessly or casually without urgent destination. Then ‘shop’ joined with ‘meander’ means to wander through the ENTIRE area of consideration, examining or at least touching EVERY item on display.

This combined meaning, as foreboding and foreshadowing of evil as it is – is still incomplete without a place to do the aforementioned activity. This intimidating place is the MALL – mall is another four-letter word that probably shouldn’t be talked about, but I find it necessary for this venting of emotions.

My opinion is that the word mall is misspelled in this application and should be spelled maul – meaning: to be clawed, bitten and dragged around by an extremity in a stone cavern by a large predator. These two words sound the same and have somewhat the same meaning – you can probably figure out what I mean.

Having described the activity, the method by which it is done and the place in which it is carried out in this manner, is it any wonder that my horror of going through such an experience is only exceeded by my dread of one day – in the future – having to do it again.

There are several other things that evoke feelings of angst such as this but my death is not among them – that because I know that I know that I know that I have a Friend waiting for me on the other side of this life. ec

To be continued.

15 Comments:

Blogger Anvilcloud said...

I don't go to malls. Well, I suppose that I do, once or twice a year, but it's generally to a specific store in a mall.

1/23/2006 11:05:00 AM  
Blogger bubba said...

There is only one mall near me. I don't go there. I go to super walmart. I love to shop. Its just the money thing and the room to have all I want. lol.

1/23/2006 12:44:00 PM  
Blogger madcapmum said...

Mr. E, I'm not a gratuitous shopper, but now that I know the Bad Word connection, I'd hardly like to be a stumbling block to the young people around me. "Whatever shall I do?" she wailed, "The library is trapped in a mall!"

1/23/2006 12:53:00 PM  
Blogger mreddie said...

AC - The thing I have done, to my great relief, is to take my spice to the mall and stay in the car, composing wild stuff like this. :)

bubba - I too will choose Wal-Mart over THE MALL, but I only go there occasionally.

MCM - Having a library in the mall is like an oxymoron or a mixed metaphor or something - what were they thinking? :) :) ec

1/23/2006 01:29:00 PM  
Blogger JunieRose2005 said...

I don't average going to the MALL once a year! I avoid heavy traffic when possible-and my husband HATES shopping so I don't go 'Malling' often!

I do a lot of shopping at Super Wal-Mart tho! It's on my side of town and easy to get to -PLUS- I like one stop shopping! :)

:) haven't run into Bubba yet!

June

1/23/2006 01:34:00 PM  
Blogger mreddie said...

junierose - It is only in a very weak moment that I get roped into the MALL thing - I must stay strong! :) ec

1/23/2006 01:43:00 PM  
Blogger Bonita said...

Malls truly are sensory overload - they do help you run from place to place, like little gerbils on a treadmill. I have difficulty going into them - sensory overload.

1/23/2006 01:47:00 PM  
Blogger grannyfiddler said...

you have my sympathies, Mr. E. i'm with you about both 4-letter words. malls and other horribly crowded, commercial places are, however, fabulous places for people-watching, which is one of my most favorite passtimes.

1/23/2006 03:05:00 PM  
Blogger mreddie said...

bonita - I do agree with you on the overload. There are many other things I'd rather waste my time on. :)

junierose - The one-stop shopping is a great attraction for me as well. Most of my shopping is at the grocery, since I am the official grocery buyer around here. ec

1/23/2006 04:51:00 PM  
Blogger mreddie said...

grannyfiddler - People watching is something I do as well, I usually make up stories about them and how they got the way they are. ec


Wow - I need to slow down and smell the grits, I answered one comment twice!! :) :) :) :)

1/23/2006 04:58:00 PM  
Blogger thebeloved said...

*giggle, giggle* I agree. :D

1/23/2006 07:19:00 PM  
Blogger mreddie said...

thebeloved - It gets worse in part two. :) ec

1/23/2006 10:04:00 PM  
Blogger adannells said...

My husband feels the exact same way! The mall is the last place he wants to spend his time. Now that we are married he has me do all his clothes shopping. There is an occasion when he will buy a new pair of work pants but for the most part he would rather I do it. Which I don't mind because I always bring along. But I have not been to the mall is quite a while and when I do go I like to get what I am looking for and get out! Shopping at the mall tends to give me a horrible headache. And I do mean an actual physical headache. I end up on the couch the rest of the day with an ice pack on my head! :)

1/23/2006 10:16:00 PM  
Blogger adannells said...

I always bring along a friend is what I meant to say! :)

1/23/2006 10:17:00 PM  
Blogger mreddie said...

adannells - The odors of fabric and perfume really mess with my sinuses and I have wound up with a headache as well. ec

1/23/2006 10:34:00 PM  

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